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Christine Stevens
Christine Stevens

13.1K Followers

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Published in The Haven

·Pinned

In the Future, Books Won't Be hard

They will be fun and easy to read and everyone will love them — Welcome to the new world of literature, as reimagined by yours truly, in a book that is as easy to read as the crappiest clickbait slide show story, but without the ads and with plenty of pics to give your poor ole brain a rest from the words. Words can…

Humor

2 min read

In the Future, Books Won't Be hard
In the Future, Books Won't Be hard
Humor

2 min read


Published in The Haven

·11 hours ago

You Must Delete Negative Comments ASAP

They are highly contagious — Human beings are sharks. When they smell blood in the water they go into a feeding frenzy and soon their ugly mouths are just dripping with blood. Medium has taught me this. An Academic Analysis Of Negative Comments And Their Deleterious Effect On Society By Christeneth S. Stevenski Noted Academic and Researcher Abstract: Negative comments on blog posts, social media posts, news items…

Medium

8 min read

You Must Delete Negative Comments ASAP
You Must Delete Negative Comments ASAP
Medium

8 min read


Published in The Haven

·1 day ago

If Jesus Knew What The Right-Wing Christians Were Doing In His Name

I wonder if he’d be a bit displeased…. — Jesus came to a state in the South To see it was all about He saw his name on a house Went in to check it out

Religion

5 min read

If Jesus Knew What The Right-Wing Christians Were Doing In His Name
If Jesus Knew What The Right-Wing Christians Were Doing In His Name
Religion

5 min read


Published in The Haven

·3 days ago

Is This A Low-Key Breakup Or Does He Really “Just Need A Little Space?”

Examine his last three texts closely for 72 straight hours then take this quiz — First of all, if he really used the words, “I just need a little space,” then I’m afraid he was a very basic boyfriend. So, the quiz will really be more about examining yourself than him. For instance: 1. You need a basic boyfriend because you are: a) a basic…

Dating

2 min read

Is This A Low-Key Breakup Or Does He Really “Just Need A Little Space?”
Is This A Low-Key Breakup Or Does He Really “Just Need A Little Space?”
Dating

2 min read


Published in The Haven

·5 days ago

These Wives Divorced Cheating Husbands After Spotting Suspicious Details in Selfies

Can you guess what got these scoundrels caught? Answers in the upside-down on the bottom. — Pay attention to details, folks, especially when boning off piste. Sure, you have to send a selfie home to your SO to keep up the ruse of your loyalty and good character. Just make sure you don’t give away the farm by including incriminating evidence in the frame. …

Sex

4 min read

These Wives Divorced Cheating Husbands After Spotting Suspicious Details in Selfies
These Wives Divorced Cheating Husbands After Spotting Suspicious Details in Selfies
Sex

4 min read


Published in The Haven

·6 days ago

My Boyfriend Plans On Going To Heaven In The Afterlife

“Won’t you miss me?” I asked him. — He was surprised when I told him that I had no intention of going to heaven in the afterlife. Look, it’s Spain. There’s a very deep vein of Catholicism in this country. …

Humor

4 min read

My Boyfriend Plans On Going To Heaven In The Afterlife
My Boyfriend Plans On Going To Heaven In The Afterlife
Humor

4 min read


Published in The Haven

·Mar 17

Why On Earth Do People Want Or Need Wordle Hints?

I just don’t get it — Please give me a hint. Because I’m stumped. THE FECKING LETTERS ARE THE FECKING HINTS!!!! FOR FECKS SAKE! Sorry, I been watching Irish TV shows, Bad Sisters, Derry Girls. I love Irish women. Don’t you? Irish men, meh. But these Irish women, I love em. Sorry, I’m getting off-topic. So…

Wordle

4 min read

Why On Earth Do People Want Or Need Wordle Hints?
Why On Earth Do People Want Or Need Wordle Hints?
Wordle

4 min read


Published in The Haven

·Mar 16

Are You Really A Good Person?

Take our quiz and find out today! — Science suggests that we’re not nearly as good and wonderful and decent as we think we are. Hitler thought he was a great guy. Trump thinks he’s just super. Even serial murderer John Wayne Gacy thought he was a lovely man. We all think we’re really good and we make excuses for our not-so-good behavior so that it becomes not so bad. Well, finally scientists have given…

Morality

7 min read

Are You Really A Good Person?
Are You Really A Good Person?
Morality

7 min read


Published in The Haven

·Mar 14

Phony Silicon Valley Libertarian F*cks Now Begging Government To Help Them

God damn it, Peter Thiel and company. God damn it, best buddies of right wing fanatic Elon Musk! God damn it all to hell! I can’t even. I can’t even. I will try though, even though I can’t even. I will begin with this guy. His name is David Sacks…

Money

3 min read

Phony Silicon Valley Libertarian F*cks Now Begging Government To Help Them
Phony Silicon Valley Libertarian F*cks Now Begging Government To Help Them
Money

3 min read


Published in MuddyUm

·Mar 14

How To Prepare For Your Semester Abroad In Hell

A helpful checklist for the wayfaring student — Congratulations on your acceptance to the Semester Down Below program. Get ready for the experience of an after-lifetime. We’re sure you have lots of questions about how to best prepare for the big trip. What should you pack for study abroad in hell? Do you need travel insurance? How should…

College

5 min read

How To Prepare For Your Semester Abroad In Hell
How To Prepare For Your Semester Abroad In Hell
College

5 min read

Christine Stevens

Christine Stevens

13.1K Followers

Funny lady, writer of satire and sex, proud Californian. Like me? You can buy me a coffee here: https://buymeacoffee.com/xtinesteveO. Cheers!

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