I'm gonna be honest with you because you are so nice. I think your piece is a bit general. I don't usually tell writers how to write, but I am going to tell you. The reason I don't tell writers how to write is I want to be the best. But I'm going to tell you the secret. It's to be more specific. Like Tony Robins, he does a lot of very specific things. Did you know he used to have people walk over fire at the end of his seminars. And he makes people cry in his seminars, and he does a special breathing exercise to get himself worked up, I mean, i don't know too much but I've seen a movie about him. Plus he got nailed for trying to seduce underage girls, like most of these fuckers do. Anyhow, my point is, just a few specific things for your fake "program" would make it SO MUCH BETTER. Like if you invented specific things that are not exactly those Tony Robins things but people kinda get the reference. I mean I will publish it as it is, that's no problem. But I like you so i thought I would tell you the truth. Honestly, I just lie to most of the writers and say great when really it's not great. Great is specific. Most people are WAY too general, like ten times too general. Readers hate general, they just hate it. Readers are suckers for anything specific--ANYTHING. Don't say toilet paper. Say Charmin 4-ply extra deluxe toilet paper. Know what I mean. I don't know why, but I guess because you like sofie and he is my bf's crush I feel close to you! Let me know what you want me to do. (Oh that sounds sexy! But I didn't mean it that way! Ha) Plus we're both 34. I feel you. Yours, Christine