Mind Bending Secret Of The Universe Revealed

This is truly mind-blowing and it changed my life

Photo by Kamesh Vedula on Unsplash

I know, people make big claims around here. I’m as guilty as anyone of making huge promises in my titles. Hey, what can I say, it works.

Eyeballs, eyeballs, eyeballs!

That’s what it’s all about. But truly, today, I have something I can really deliver on. The only thing that I’m questioning is well…the morality of revealing this mind-bending secret to you.

It probably would be better for me to keep it to myself. But, I’ve never been that good at keeping things to myself.

There is an ethical problem with revealing this secret

But then again, I’ve never been that good at ethics either.

I might as well begin at the beginning.

I met this amazing computer hacker named Juan. I mean, this guy is a genius. He fixed my computer, he gave me oral sex. It was stunning.

I gave him oral sex, he fixed my iPhone.

I had no idea that the iPhone was capable of all the things my iPhone can do now, after a mere fifteen minutes in his hand. I have no idea what he did, but when he gave it back to me, it was purring like a…