Well, first of all, it’s like owning a property that is rapidly depreciating in value, that’s for sure. Because, as the supermodel Paulina Porizkova said, when they turn 40, women become invisible, even supermodels! Men just don’t notice them on the street any more. Not like they noticed them when they were in their twenties or thirties. …
“I know, I know Giselle,” I say. “He’s a fucking jerk. You’re absolutely right to be mad. Come sit here on the bed and have some wine.”
I pour her a little wine. She takes a sip and then catches herself.
“Wait a minute Chrissy, you’re trying to get me drunk. I know, you like to seduce me when I’m angry at Richard, but not tonight. I’m really upset, can’t you see that? I just need a shoulder to cry on. I don’t need you to fuck me.”
“Of course of course. Cry on my shoulder come on, baby.”
So I give her a hug and a squeeze. I kiss her tears and tell her how sorry I am that she’s in such a rotten relationship. Then I tell her the tears make her look beautiful. They do, too. She has some freckles under her eyes and the tears form little rivers around them and it’s a gorgeous sight. …
Yes, this woman was shortly afterwards attacked by sharks. Can you guess how many attacked her? That’s correct, there were four sharks. She was so happy to see these graceful creatures of the sea, see? She held up four fingers. Unfortunately, she didn’t survive.
But look at how happy she looks, moments before tragedy struck. Really, why would you want a nice lady like that to get ripped to shreds by not one but FOUR sharks! What’s wrong with you exactly? Did your mother not show you the love you deserved?
As you examine the photos that follow, you would do well to examine your own soul. Is it ordinary schadenfreude, or something more pathological that makes you want to see these gruesome pics? …
We combine here cell phone footage, surveillance cameras, and Police Officers Bodycams, as well as news footage from mainstream media and Newsreel services Pathe News and the March of Time.
The sale starts tomorrow at 9 Am in front of Wayne LaPierre’s house here in Roanoke.
It’s going to take us a while to get this stuff set up for sale, so please don’t come until 9AM. Thank you.
We at the NRA do not sell weapons. We sell something much more powerful and destructive than guns — we sell righteousness. Sure, if a Martian came down here and looked at you guys strutting around with your automatic weapons, he might very rightfully conclude that you are violent maniacs. But because of your membership in the NRA, your vile, aggressive and sadistic love of guns, mayhem and death has become a noble cause! …
Yeah, this is the MyPillow billionaire who just popped into Trump’s office with some notes about very scary things.
MyPillow founder and Trump supporter Mike Lindell was photographed entering the White House carrying notes which seemed to advocate the imposition of martial law.
Here are some words that you could see when you blew up the photo of his notes:
“Insurrection Act now as a result of the assault on the” and “martial law if necessary.”
We don’t know if Trump is listening to his advice yet, but we do know that this argument with your wife isn’t just gong to fix itself. …
Sex and the City Without Samantha is like… a martini without an olive. It lacks that bite.
Sex and the City Without Samantha is like… sitting on the toilet for like an hour and nothing happening — it’s like the TV version of constipation.
Sex and the City Without Samantha is like that great Da Vinci painting The Last Supper minus the guy in the middle.
It’s like…a guy playing poker claiming he’s got four queens. Then he lays down his hand and you see it’s three queens and the two of clubs. “That’s not a queen,” you cry. “That’s the two of clubs.” And the guy just shrugs. That fourth queen, that’s Samantha. Or maybe not. Maybe Samantha is the ace. Three queens, ace high, that’s what Sex and the City was like. …
Was I attracted to her? Kind of, I guess. She was in her early thirties, married, and very successful, a vice president of a movie studio where I got a job as an assistant D girl, that is, someone who reads scripts and sometimes gets to tag along to meetings and act semi-important.
In my brief sojourn into the movie business, I expected the Harvey Weinstein treatment, and I did get some of that, I admit.
But nothing like what M____ gave me. She was relentless.
Sexual harassment or crossing of boundaries that makes the employee uncomfortable happens no matter the gender of the boss in question. In some ways, when your boss is a woman, it’s harder to stand up for your boundaries and demand they show you more respect. …
He was a very accomplished man and a great intellectual hero of mine. I’ll call him Geophrey, because he did spell his real name weirdly like that. Somehow I got to meet him at a book store reading some years ago. I was twenty-five and he was 65. He asked me for my number and I gave it to him.
About two months later he called me.
“Listen,” he said. “You should know, I’m a very happily married man. I didn’t call you because, well, I needed a little time to get over the infatuation. I’ve lived a long life and I know my infatuations never last longer than two months. …